Round two

Some secrets are better left unsaid. I remember you staring straight ahead, like you just couldn't even make sense of my words. You heard me, I know you did, but it's like your mind went into shutdown. Were you trying to numb the pain, or just numb from it? I know you'll overcome this like you always do. I wish I could do it with you, but I think that ship has sailed, and I wasn't on it. I leave because it's just too hard. You think you're the only one I hurt, but it's just not true. I hurt myself, too. You'll never know how much I loved you, and how long I waited for you to come around, but even before now, it's like you were always somewhere else. I didn't mind when your mind wandered, but I always wondered if you thought of me while you were away. I thought of you every time I slid that key into the lock. I thought of you every time I walked away, and nothing in the world could make me feel better about this. You can call it addiction, or just say I liked the attention. You can claim I couldn't love you and still do this to you, and most people would agree with you. I'm a monster, and most people should agree with you. You were my world, and now I'm left an alien in a world that's no longer mine. I know you'll be fine. You always were the strong one.